An Open Letter to Victims:
This blog is not for you. Unless you want to be offended by an arrogant, out-of-control, right-wing nutcase, stop reading and go find something interesting on Youtube. (Preferably a talking animal or something else that won’t accidentally inspire you to make a personal change.)
I talk a LOT about individual responsibility around here, and I don’t buy that anyone in America is helpless to society. I believe everyone runs into obstacles (some legitimately unfair), but that most problems occur as a result of sin. And even truly mistreated individuals have the power to overcome it. This is good news because it means change is possible! Bad things can be fixed!
Unless you like being a victim. If you like blaming other people, or you’re not brave enough to take charge of the things over which you have control, then run. Run away! Don’t let me challenge you with my “you-can-do-it” insanity!
I’ll use studies and statistics often. But I don’t fill each post with footnotes for two reasons:
1. 1. If you’re already inclined to disagree with me, you’ll find something wrong with my research anyway.
2. 2. A large percentage of my citations don’t come from a source in a science journal. They come from The Source: the Bible. If you have a problem with it, I dare you to fact check this Source for yourself. (Spoiler: MANY people have tried to disprove it and failed.) Meanwhile, if you practice the biblical principles I put forth, you’ll see they work 100% of the time.
Sometimes my style causes an uncontrollable urge to call me names and accuse me of having serious problems. But I only want to talk about ONE serious problem, which all of us has in common: sin stemming from selfishness. If you don't think you're a sinner, you’ll find nothing of value here. If you think being a victim will work for you eventually—you like protesting the government, you blame your spouse/kids for your problems, or you want to enjoy lots of food/sex/recreation in hopes they make you happy, that’s fine! Just find another blogger for support.
Here, you’ll see that selfishness which leads to disobedience of the Bible which leads to societal problems interest me. You might say that’s my specialty. I’ve done a lot of thinking about it. I’ve done a lot of reading/observing. And this is where I put my conclusions... So, if you wouldn’t tell your English teacher, “I don’t trust all this stuff about verb tenses…where is the proof?” (Or, if you wouldn’t insult the math whiz with, “You always have answers, and it makes you sound cocky. Is there anything you DON’T know, Mr. SmartyPants?”), then please don’t criticize me when I share what experience and practice have taught ME. Just find a teacher who says what you want to hear.
I’m just saying, if you don’t like what I’m teaching, kindly exit my classroom.
Thank you.
P.S. For a similar read-at-your-own-risk post (which includes a few reasons I appeal to The Source), check out For Those Ready to Eat.
Bahahaha. Ah yes, your interpretation of the Bible is flawless so no one should argue with you on it... wait a minute, doesn't the Bible talk about how all people are flawed... hmmm...
ReplyDeleteA) I wish it were my goal to make you squirm with defensiveness, because if it were, I would find so much success in this. Sadly, I really just wanted to challenge you on your profoundly racist statements and your arrogant statements about knowing what certain groups of people think or feel with no evidence. I am pretty sure that the Bible can't tell you how poor people feel about domestic policy in the United States in 2011. It has some great guiding principles that can be APPLIED to domestic policy, but you claiming to magically know how poor people feel about welfare is... almost as comical as this post.
B) This is called the world wide web. It is public. When you put your opinion into the public sphere... insert dramatic music... PEOPLE RESPOND. And you've invited them to by posting it... wait for it... publicly. I know, it's a crazy concept. (You know, you can make blogs private...)
If you're just joining the Hate-On-Amanda show, let me catch you up.
ReplyDeleteI said: "The needy know welfare and affirmative action don't work." That’s when I magically saw the thoughts of the poor. That’s when we stopped discussing the intent of my posts and moved to word-usage and HOW I post. Now someone might rationalize that--if welfare worked--its members wouldn't be "needy" anymore. It’s similar to saying, "Wet people know their towels aren't working." Plus, in all my reading, listening, and observing, I’ve NEVER heard anyone—poor or otherwise—who said, “The system isn’t broken! Keep it the same!” That’s because the needy know welfare and affirmative action don’t work. But, sometimes when people say “you're arrogant” it means, “don’t tell me I’m wrong even if I contradict myself and can’t contradict you.”
Other things I've said include, "All people ARE inherently equal," "Minorities are just as capable as anybody." AND "Change starts with individuals." In the glorious, anonymous internet, these statements are scandalous, yet it's OKAY to call somebody’s work "bullshit" or make other personal shots. When somebody gets out-argued and they haven’t given their name, they can say things even more rude than what supposedly offended them.
That's why I'm starting a new rule: if you won’t put your name behind your criticisms, they aren't worth my time. I demand to "face" my accusers. If I know more about the critics I've had, maybe it will help me understand how they can miss inconsistencies like: “I don’t pretend to have all the answers for the poor. It’s more about empowering them than teaching them the ways of the powerful.” (1. No one ever has become empowered without learning the ways of being powerful. 2. Even though it’s a senseless one, that’s an “answer.”) Maybe somebody who reveals their identity won’t feel comfortable ranting about the things I’ve “done wrong” and “should do,” all wrapped up with: “You might learn something surprising when you aren’t lecturing people...”
If you really think it’s out-of-line to encourage myself, my friends, and other groups of people to take responsibility for themselves, that’s fine. But, if you want to tell me about it, you have to tell me who you are first. The next circular, finger-pointing, tirade from ANYbody writing as “Anonymous” will be deleted.
I wonder how knowing my name will change how you feel about my comments. This is very interesting - the topic of anonymity. I agree that some people use it to make terrible attacks on others. I especially feel that way when people/situations are covered by the media without their permission and then those people are attacked online.
ReplyDeleteIn this situation, however, you are knowingly and publicly stating your personal opinions. You also rarely use any evidence besides the fact that it's how you feel (we won't get into that right now). I wonder how you expect any disagreement with your ideas not to come across as a personal attack when you say yourself that these are your personal opinions and that you don't need evidence. In essence, you are making the basis of your opinion very personal when you refuse to cite any other support for your statements.
Things sound nicer already. Thank you. :) Though, let's be honest. Your statements didn't "come across as a personal attack" because you disagreed. I like friendly debate. I don't like being told I'm out of control and love to hear myself preach. No misunderstanding here.
ReplyDeleteI HAVE given support: most often the Bible. I brainstorm ideas with fellow Bible-believers about ways to apply its principles. Personal responsibility is a recurring theme, so I share examples of where we might use it.
I also use logic equations frequently. For instance, I deduced that "victory for black people" EQUALS racism BECAUSE 'winning' on the basis of color alone isn't any different from 'losing' because of color. You said the election of a black president is a victory for all Americans, "but especially for blacks." So, I argued there really is no such thing as a "more" winner. To say "especially" draws lines again. If we're totally equal and working together--then Team America wins together. If blacks deserve EXTRA celebration because they look like the President, it's a racist attitude.)
So... for what statement do I need more support?
(I completely disagree with you regarding the tone of these comments. You have been just as personal in your attacks as I've been, suggesting that I don't take action and speak for poor people. I also feel perfectly comfortable calling you preachy because you refer to this blog as your classroom. You preach a lot about personal responsibility, but I don't see you talking about how you actively empower people either.)
ReplyDeleteA statement doesn't not have to be TRUE to be logical. For example, your statement " 'winning' on the basis of color alone isn't any different from 'losing' because of color." There is a difference between saying "Wow, Obama won the election because black people are better than white people" and saying "Wow, Obama won the election despite all of this racism he has faced his whole life." There is nothing racist about giving someone credit for overcoming adversity. (And that is where my statement about learning from people who have been oppressed comes from - they have survived a society that puts them at a disadvantage. You cannot empower someone to learn from more powerful people, because the main reason those people have power is that they were already given an advantage due to their identity (male, white, born into the upper/middle class, heterosexual, etc.) It is a victory for black people when there is evidence that they are gaining access to powerful positions that have historically not been accessible.
I also think its interesting that you have not responded to my comment about your discriminatory statements. You said that it is OK for employers to discriminate against a person because of the statistics associated with their race/gender/etc. I said that it is discrimination because you are judging an individual based on their identification to a group (versus individual merit). That's illegal.
Also, when you pin your entire argument on a Bible verse that YOU have interpreted, then you have to be willing to admit your bias that has impacted your interpretation of the Bible verse. Again, this is why when everything is about your opinion, things are inherently personal. The statement is not made in a vacuum, its made by YOU.
ReplyDeleteRead my comments again, Sarah. I was under the impression we were sharing ideas, and I meant to criticize your conclusions. I’m sorry if my excitement about the topic translated to insulting you personally. Really! In my house, friendly banter is fun—even when we strongly disagree. But I’ve ALWAYS drawn the line at “ad hominem.”
ReplyDeleteIn fact, it was out of respect I said: “I DO care about your opinion, even though we disagree. I don't think you're some space-case caught in an alternate reality. I'm sure you're a competent thinker. I sense your frustration with me, and I'm sorry about that…” Later, I said, “My only chance is if you'd…show me what good advice looks like.” Obviously, I was sarcastic about my hopelessness. But I really am asking you to share your opinions with me.
You also said I was racist, except you haven’t proven your case. For example, I did NOT “say it was okay for employers to discriminate.” Please, go read it again. I said it’s statistically risky to hire a black person. Consider that. I mean, according to “odds,” it’s HARDER to find good, black employees due to less schooling, high crime, etc. I'm reading the data. I agree employers SHOULD judge on individual merits—not statistics. But, the entire time, I’ve only been trying to argue for what a single person can do to help the situation. A black individual cannot force a change of heart in racist employers. But he or she CAN encourage those bringing down the stats to rise up and do better.
Also, overcoming obstacles is a victory for Obama. Changing racial attitudes is a victory for society. When a Democrat gets elected, it’s a victory for liberals. But you still haven’t justified a victory for blacks...? We can't lump people together based on skin color rather than achievement, right? So what did ALL blacks do in 2008 to achieve a “special” victory, apart from non-blacks?
Finally, the Bible is not as difficult-to-understand as people who haven't read it believe. You've heard "Thou shalt not kill" and "Love Thy Neighbor," I presume. There's lots more where that came from. If you think I've misinterpreted something, show me where.
Anyway, I’m finished defending myself now because this horse is dead. So, what do you want to hear from me now to end this peaceably? What would an open-minded, non-arrogant person say next?
You come across as very sarcastic and insincere, for what it's worth.
ReplyDeleteI think you are arguing semantics over discussing a win for blacks. I agree that a win for blacks is inherently a win for society. I've explained already why it is a win for black people - they are seeing for the first time that someone with their skin color can overcome the adversity and become president. White people don't have this problem, so the win is less personal for us.
I won't get into Biblical interpretation right now. Too huge of a topic.
I do think you were being racist. You talked about helping Jamal and Lakisha become more employable, yet you missed the entire point that their resumes are exactly the same as the resumes with white names. So, how exactly, based on individual merit, do you think they can "become more employable" unless they change their cultural (ie their name) and racial identity? The second part is that you stated that businessmen use stats and then named off some negative stats about black people. Implied in that statement is that you think its ok for businessmen to use racial stats when hiring, and that's actually illegal. You talk about high school drop-outs "polluting the data" and how black people should blame other blacks for the negative statistics that cause businessmen not to hire them. Girl, that is BY DEFINITION discrimination. It is the EMPLOYER'S responsibility not to discriminate, not a black person's responsibility to make sure white people have no excuses for being racist. It's like saying that a rape victim is at fault instead of the rapist because the rape victim was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Fact: rape can't happen unless there is a rapist involved. Another fact: Discrimination can't happen unless people discriminate.
As far as a peaceable resolution:
I would really like for you to admit that you made a racist statement. Given that seems very unlikely, I will agree that this horse is dead. I can't think of many other ways to explain my point. Another thing you could do is stop making blanket statements that have no evidence behind them.
1. "I'd say "tell Asians and Jews," too, but they're too busy taking advantage of The Land of Opportunity to obsess over the fact that--once upon a time--they were discriminated against, too." Check out those hate crime stats I sent you.
2. "Where are these racists? Why do many blacks live in poor neighborhoods? Is it because all or most real estate agents believe blacks are inferior and won't sell nicer houses to them? Or is it because they can't afford to move? Why are many blacks and women struggling for money? Is it because all or most heads-of-business believe them to be inferior and won't hire them? Or are they usually less qualified for well-paying jobs? Maybe this issue of inequality starts in schools, then. Do all or most teachers spend more time with white students than black ones?" LOOK IT UP!!! Black kids go to poorer schools with fewer resources - that's racism (and classism)! I already showed you research that showed black people are discriminated against for employment, but you magically made that into their fault even though all the resumes were the same.
3. "The poor know that welfare doesn't work." Show me some kind of research that show poor people don't think government programs help them at all. Also, if you knew much about government benefits, you would know that the old-fashioned concept of welfare does not exist anymore. People have to attend job training, apply to X number of jobs each month, etc in order to get benefits. That system may not be perfect, but I know from working with low income people that it really helps them get back on their feet and provide some stability for their children.
I entirely agree that viewing anyone who is oppressed as a victim is not empowering, but I do not think that blaming them is empowering either.
1. Having been reminded of the Asians and Jews comment, I will admit I made a racist statement. I implied that all Asians and Jews are successful--but I did lump them together as an ethnic group. For the inappropriate joke, I apologize. And I will admit that the way I worded my paragraph about unfair employers made it sound like condoning them.
ReplyDelete2. I recognize that there still is a gap between the races. But there are two possible ways to focus the solution. A person can try to change other people's wrongs (like unfair employers), or he can fix himself. Since we already were talking about black individuals, I shared what I would tell THEM to work on... If I'd written about business in America, then I'd criticize employers.
I'd like to share a story, if I can, in hopes it illustrates this: When I was teaching, I had two students who fought CONSTANTLY. One was a bully, with a short fuse; the other was "that kid" who whined "Teeeeeacher" all the time. The bully got in trouble the most, because he resorted to hitting and other obviously wrong things. But, for some reason, the other kid always wanted to play WITH THE BULLY. That's not wrong--just puzzling. It didn't matter there were ten other kids in the room willing to pay attention to him. He wanted THE BULLY'S attention. Then, when he was denied the chance to play, he yelled, "teeeeacher, he's not sharing!" I was physically capable of making the bully share. But, in my mind, that doesn't solve the heart issue. I want to give both parties something to change from within. So, I pulled the second kid aside and said, "You can't make somebody share. But you may be able to make him WANT to share by (in his case) not following him around and whining."
Here's my point: I tried not to scold one in front of the other, because that would make them think the OTHER was "the wrong one." If bully-kid knew I told the whiner not to whine, Bully-kid would use that as his excuse for being a jerk. "He's annoying me!" And the second kid knew I HAD to take the bully to the corner when he hit, so he instigated. Needless to say, they never became friends. But, both had parts to play in reaching a solution.
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ReplyDeleteDepending on my audience, I offer a different part of the solution. My post about "Victory for Black People" was written to challenge the PC definition of "racism." You're right, it's semantics. But that was my point: the difference between "okay" and "offensive" was whether it's said by a black or white. I want people to consider that.
But, I write for other audiences, too. For instance, in my post "It Could Be Better Spent" I said: stop worrying about what the royal couple did with their money and make sure you're helping the poor with your own. I assume you and I agree we Americans are rich compared to most and that we should give back.
Basically: I work with low-income women experiencing unplanned pregnancies, so my message is "YOU HAVE OPTIONS, and here are the things you can control..." I will not say, "There may be an unfair employer who won't give you an interview." It may discourage them from the ten other kids willing to share their toys. Oops--I mean they may be discouraged and miss the many potential companies we refer them to. :)
I have yet to meet a white businessman experiencing an unplanned pregnancy, but I'll encourage him not to be racist if I do. (Joke. Just playing around.) By the way, I know this is the longest post yet, but I hope it's less upsetting than the others.
Finally, even though you didn't ask for this, I want to say I'm sorry for not speaking the truth with LOVE. God convicted me about how I wrapped my message, and I know I got carried away in the comments section. Though I feel my posts were justifiable, it's HOW I defended myself later (with passion and preachiness) which bristled you, I think. You deserve the utmost respect regardless of whether I receive it in return, and my sprinkles of sarcasm made me sound like a jerk.
When I'm face to face with my clients, I'm careful. When I'm posting to my online journal, I let loose. So, even though I disagree that--just because it's public it's open to rudeness--and even though I will continue to write with excitement and conviction, I do apologize if I left a bitter taste in your mouth... Sincerely.
I hope you'll visit often in the future, without feeling I'm speaking to you personally. But, even if you don't, may God bless you, keep you, and make His face shine on you.
You and I see things very differently.
ReplyDeleteI think you oversimplify situations (racism = bullying) because you don't actually understand them. I don't mean to say that you aren't smart, I just think that your natural inclination (because you are smart) is to come to logical conclusions instead of going out in the world and figuring out the complexity. That is messy and scary.
I don't think you can compare racism to bullying. Children exist in an environment they cannot control. Adults need to help bullies learn they cannot bully and adults need to protect kids who are bullied. There are different kinds of bullying that occur too (small children picking on each other versus high school students whose lives are a living hell). I can see scolding a whiner, the targets of "real" bullying are not whiners. I think this is where you really go off path. You really blame victims. Read a few articles on kids who are intensely bullied (say middle/high school level, not little kids who are still learning social skills). You might be surprised how hard these kids HAVE worked to avoid bullying. They aren't the problem. It's the bullies who need to be a) stopped and b) helped through whatever is causing them to bully.
Racism is a societal phenomenon. You are right, we need to empower victims. But that is different than telling them that its their fault. Empowering victims means helping them express THEIR experience. It means supporting them in coming up with solutions. But it also means insisting that oppressors (like racist employers) STOP. The oppressor is the one doing the wrong thing, not the victim (I prefer the term "target group" to victim because its more empowering though). Like I said, racism can't occur unless someone acts racist, just like rape can't occur unless someone decides to rape another person. The offending party is MORE responsible than the victim. In fact, the offending party is BY DEFINITION responsible.
In your comment, you talk about how pointless it is to tell someone they are being discriminated against. I agree. You don't need to tell someone who experiences racism that they are being discriminated against - they are ALREADY discouraged because the ALREADY know. What they don't have are allies who say, YES! This is WRONG! Racist employers SHOULD be penalized! (Of course its more complicated). It is true that people who are oppressed have a LOT more power than they think, but I think they have the power to change the world, not just their specific group of people. I think a major difference between us is that you don't really see the societal power differential inherent in oppression. It's not an absolute (unchangeable) situation, but it's the status quo.
(Of course, there are people in denial of their oppression, like domestic violence survivors. But these people REALLY need to hear that they are being victimized so they will leave, build self-confidence, and survive.)
I think you should really focus on why you are so concerned with having the target group (aka victims) change things instead of the person doing the wrong thing. Why is it that you don't write about the business aspect?
Finally, I really appreciate your apology. It was sincere and humble. I wish you the best of luck on your road of self-improvement- it's certainly one I relate to. I know that I can get passionate too, and I also struggle with the correct wording at times. I think it is a common issue for people with passion... and to be honest I would rather be passionate and struggle with how to express it than lack passion.