I just read this piece by Stephen Crowder in which he defends people who marry young because Jennifer Nagy of the Huffington post argued "people shouldn't be allowed" to marry before age 25..
As a side note, I absolutely love Miss Nagy's conclusion..."Maybe there are 20-year-olds who get married and stay madly in love for their whole lives... Maybe there is such a thing as fairies and unicorns, too."
(It cracks me up because people have used this "powerful argument" with me. Check out the comments section here. The 11th comment from the top is the pertinent one.)
(Other side note: how do people who reason this way get paid to write?! I'm over here, Big Magazine! Unicorns, unicorns, unicorns! See? Talent!)
Anyway, I conclude Miss Nagy didn't "Throw away her childhood," the way Luke and I did--or the way any person must do before they get married. But is 25 the special age? Do you agree with Nagy or with Crowder?
I've actually been giving this topic a lot of thought lately. I've been so utterly frustrated with the culture inspired and upheld by our good and über-conservative friend Josh Harris that I've had to go back and read his books so that I could more suitably defend myself against them. I came to the conclusion that fundamentally I may agree with him (purity and God-focused relationships are the only way to go), but in application I really don't. For me, at least.
ReplyDeleteI don't think there's a "magic age" for love and marriage-- that seems just as idealistic as unicorns dancing with pots of gold under rainbows. I think God takes into account the point of life of the individuals involved and the amount of impact they may have separately or together. Not that some people don't rush into marriage. But sometimes perhaps part of the cost of their impact together is length of "childhood." I think it's great Miss Nagy has comforted her marriagelessness/singlefulness with a contentment that comes from using it well. But I think a danger here is when we take something God has taught us in the context of our own lives and try to make it a principle to follow across the board for everyone else.
Those are great things to keep in mind, Lyndi! Thanks!
DeleteI just don't understand. So, if Nagy waited a few months until she was 25, she would have broken up with the guy? Those few months would have told her who she was? It just surprises me that she uses an age she was so close to reaching.
ReplyDeleteI agree with the many commenters who said (almost unanimously) that her personal immaturity is not a reason to punish everyone else.
Also, I love all the comments by people telling how young they got married and how long they've been married now!
ReplyDeleteI loved that, too! Very encouraging! Also, it suggests that the popular divorce statistics aren't as grim as people think. I read somewhere that, when controlling for people who actually *practice* their faith, cases of divorce are much lower for Christians. Yay for people who stay married for life and are PROUD of their hard work!
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